test

case
book
end
point

sizing yourself up

assume perfection about yourself-
I do, running fingers carefully through mousy
tousled hair, lips barely touching,
(careful to be never too close)

conscious choices

we hold lives in our hands sometimes;
yours stiff and unyielding
as the others wilted away slowly

playground

violently,
the swing rocks back and forth
(in the storm)
while the rain's pouring down
on polyurethane seats and
rusted iron chains

(&childhood's over)

like masturbation

grasping simulations of you
in my hands, running past like quicksand
kissing my fingertips
as they coyly slip away

embrace

you
were the only one
that didn't hold me
like I was about
to break
in your hands

---

prowl so quietly,
but walk so surely;
footsteps resounding.

you terrify me.

---

knees bang together
in anticipation

---

rumbling in the distance;
maelstrom reaches its crescendo,
and it's over (so quickly).

you are gone

missing beats,
off key -
strokes sitting by the radio;

computer's buzzing insistently,
and the phone's ringing for you

---

kitten silently tiptoes across
flowers blossoming in your abdomen;
a new beginning

wintertime

flurries descend,
lightly dancing on your eyelashes
summertime ended too soon

tiny butterflies

there is something insiduous
about how your fingers kiss
the small of my spine
and the tingling starts down my back
ending inevitably

fuck feminist thinking

There is something inherently wonderful about
seeing your girlfriend wobbling around in stilettos,
trying to get on her knees without twisting her ankles
so she can give you head.

---

tremble shake shudder
spine tingles, fingers twitching
spasms go through your heart,

leaving was never so hard,
truth never what you expect

---

fingers splayed,
reaching past recesses in our bodies,
pushing our limits

ecstasy explodes
in white flashes of light

eternal?

once i held the whole world in my arms
and i stepped back to touch your face
my fingers lingering on your cheekbones
you lifted up my chin and willed me to speak

"I would repeat you."

stargazing

fingers gently fondle
cheek bones that jut out,
stubborn and defiant

wrestle

once, you grasped my hands in yours,
as we pushed on each others
bodies gyrating to the beat of our souls

You fell on top of me

Consumerism

Surreal
Shards of steel and glass,
vertically inclined to reach for the sky
& pavement drones on,
always a step ahead, leaving you
behind

Flying paper shreds
One thing I learned today
was that whittling in the car was bad-
not because it might hurt me,
but rather,
because I might scratch the car’s finish.

---
Convienence
Doesn’t buy happiness

Revenge
“Injured? Make them pay”
Bulletin screams across billboards,
Corporate building
Clogging our veins

Dallas
I remember “kid kraddik”
Screaming out into the radio,
Processed pop tunes blaring,
Baring their aural fangs,
Pass by a church address to heaven,
777

Auxiliary Hands
I passed by 13
churches today.

Never changed my
perspectives on
The meaning of life

Peaceful Entry
Skyscrapers protrude treacherously
into the air, raping the sky.
Acid rain falls in retribution,
eating away at its tormentor.

rants

Ashes for You
I sit in your fireplace silently,
Listening to the click of your footsteps
on the wooden floors;
painted warm, unfeelingly cold.

---
It’s raining,
and I painted your face
in the condensation
on my windowpane. If only
you were staring at me
instead of my reflection

Forbidden
My hands trembled as I touched your face;
for the moment the world was in my hands.
Almost in reach, but forever out of bounds,
you asked me why I was shaking.
“Around you, I always am.”

Scenery
He was right;
you walk boldly, and loudly.
Always so sure of where you stand-
besides overturned dogs and
the smell of clean dishes.
Imperfections like me don’t
belong here in the transparency of
your gaze.

Silver Bullets
Sitting in the back of an automobile,
studying the grooves in your backseat;
wondering if I really exist,
hoping that you don’t see me

Neo Felix
Do you remember when I reached for you?
Dark and musty scents overwhelmed us,
the impending rain screeched towards our storms
& the gusts of wind passing by threw
my hair into gales of ebony shrieks around my face

we touched;
the world muted itself.

Atrophied Compassion
Do you notice
that we float in bubbles,
almost but never
making contact

Solace & Peace of Mind
I wanted to feel you so badly,
to make sure that you were real,
but I didn’t; terrified at the prospect
that you may not have been an illusion

Microsoft Word

Dear Bill Gates,
I do not care if this is not actually a poem. I demand that you get rid of the automatic capitalizations on Word because it is pissing me the fuck off. Your programs have been aggravating me to the point that I am seriously considering getting a Mac and throwing away my 16 wasted years of sitting in front of PCs.
Fuck you,Liz

Anagrams

BANG! They’ll gaze in it, eyes
sharing dares. Hike
home, jinx nor salt.

---

envy unfurls tentacles,
green vines ensnaring any hope
for a better future

---

if it were full of wonder
my friend the world
may choose to be so wonderful

little angel

your voice reeks of
nails down a chalkboard
and rusty files,
scraping away the shine
on my new car

blank computer screens

So this is how it feels
staring at your reflection
in the mirror, unceasing

Disturbed

this is my saviour?

You grabbed my hand
as we trudged through the mud.
Promises that heaven was right in front of us
never came true

weak and powerless

Once confessions are drawn out,
they don't stop coming forth.
I don't understand why you are doing this.
Gushing streams of thought rain down &

water falls from the sky
in condensed form; thoughts drift away.
The air holds better future for them
than any ears that would
never have listened otherwise.

Once you grabbed my face,
and pushed my head back until I fell.
Everyone was in shock-
except for us. No harm done.
We knew that. The entire world
couldn't have understood.

I brushed your dust off of my shoulders;
I was fine. I walked on.
Alone

No.

bitten, chapped lips
sewn together shut
in a show of apathy and
disappointment

intolerance

hands venture shakily
towards your face,
caressing eyelashes with
butterfly kisses

tonight tonight

trembling hands (click)
fingers numb from cold (click click)
whirring minds intertwine
in dark shady nights;

thoughts never meant to be heard,
always known (click click click)

relief sinks in.

good morning

your stories
are hidden in my words

glance over quickly;
some things are not
meant to be seen

mixed media

morally superior;
seagull perched on the cliff
falls down,

swooning over murky waters

pearls

anxiety rips across your face
gales of wind biting;
spooning piles of dirt into your mouth

bright intones of melodic bliss
echo, invoking memories of better times
when the sun in your face
didn't sting so harshly

paperflies in the wind,
landing at the feet
of a protesting child.

and I still love you

frustrated; quicksand slipping
through the hands, darting past fingers
time bomb's ticking

"I don't constrain myself to linear sexuality."

sloppily, tongues slide
past one another.
Faces interlock;
deep sighs of
discontent ensue.

news blares
like unwelcome trumpets
during intimate moments;

you. are. not.
a. person.

dawn

battered moon darkens;
opal sparkling
under incandescent light

dusk

bruised sunlight
turns blue, giving away its
incadescent glow

suppose

He stares.

clipped tones
shifting seats,
uncomfortable pauses
alert you

realizations

years from now
we will decompose
under the ground

where will your soul be

shampoo

fingers caress scalp
dandruff on shoulders
falls to ground

unfufilled

delicate twigs tangle in your hair,
hand grasps them lightly, knotting further
while you're trying to free the branches

intentions were always overrated

do the evolution

you know,
some people don't like
change

life isn't fair

and the wind's screaming,
rushing past your face in a desperate
impossible attempt to catch up
with the morning sun that warms it
(jealous of the sun's radiant smile)

come undone

it's going to rain again soon,
whisperings of soft padding
on the ceilings, next to fogged up
car windows

listening to radio tunes,
kissing away any imperfections
in our lives

radio activities

this will be an explosive
end scene; half lives keep dividing,

metaphorical asymptotes-
our dangerousness will

never reach zero, radio
drones on, singing processed tunes

solitude within solidarity

are you apart from us,
or are you a part of this?

hiroshima

screams of burning flesh
scorch your nostrils, inhale
& the skin peels off in
strips, baring the humanity

that lies beneath,
bringing us all

together

THIS JUST MIGHT BE A CRY FROM YOUR HELP.

ashen glances at the clock
serve as a reminder;
her face feels your touch,
and she knows.

You know now.

leafy vegetables

emerald tedrils saturate the
atmosphere, vines carressing your face
& sweeping around your senses,
poking into your ear gently;

enveloping your mouth
to supress your screams

puppy dogs

creeping suspiscions
border on the edges of sanity,
licking eagerly at the
sweat dripping
down your face

THIS IS NOT POETRY

liberalism

bustling metropolis rushes by,
black heels clicking angrily
on sidewalks, sidestepping
parked cars & emotions (forgetting

humanity) huddling together in
a mass of begging; signs held up
by panhandlers shiver in
the coolness of invisibility

underbelly of a society
eaten away by success;
Cars rush as lights turn
green, affirming Progress

the hills have eyes

chimes jingle on a door;
slam shut. Footsteps echo,
revebrating off of empty shelves

Dusty floors rise up
to greet customers,
prices haphazardly hung
next to sold items

collateral damage is evaluated.
The broom in the corner's broken,
and the freezer's warm to
the touch (on the inside)

Desolate winds blow across
civilization's last stand.
grey & brown & red & empty

turkeys

"Shannon," I cried out
"please don't leave me,

I can't comprehend
why things would ever happen
the way that they have to be"

countdown

sparkling champagne
splashes in your face,
leaving burns in your eyes

the new year's over

americana

tinkling keys on a toy piano,
ebony and ivory memories
carved into the wooden scratches

yellowed pearls drape down
the neck of the grandmother
who teaches the young girl to
curl her fingers just so,

brown hair loosely flowing
down, passing her ears and forming
bouncy curls around her face

choked up

fractured heart
stops up arteries
trying to save
the body

(soul was never
really there)

parched throat
resonates with
a cracked plea
for mercy

(and it denies
any affirmation
of our joy)

rainy days

1.
fingers splayed
across the grass
inches away
from the goal

2.
damp ground
(turned arid
desert into desolate
marsh) sinking
in; collecting
between your toes

moss ferments

3.
tiny fingers
interlock with
shaking hands,

careful! porcelain
smiles fracture
easily

4.
misty forest
trail, musky
scent, water
drops in the
sky descend,

dampening
spirits

aspen leaves, sifting in the wind

1.
as (her gaze
fell down &) the
glass shattered

dreams became
reality &
(ended her
desire for the
unattainable)
she no longer had
want for life

2.
(ash)
her only remnants
scattered out at sea
dust in the wind
dryly fading away

floating over
the water's skin
(caresses) desolate
gales mourn at
the loss of nothing

3.
and she's harked:
erroneously regal

but jauntily kicking limbs
affirm new life; revivals
of heart & soul,
cries embracing vitality

misunderstandings

tear apart the
meanings of
the words that you
speak;

arbitrary distinctions
can never convey
what we mean

barbed wire

rusted fence
brushes past
ivory legs

too short skirt
flies up in the
air, scattering

drops of blood

iced green tea

1.
sugar coated intentions
drip into the tea;
dissolving pearls
sink to the bottom.
Amber glow lights up
your face
2.
landfills of black ashes
clumped in the bottom
unfurl into dead leaves,
fighting against
floes of ice
3.
(clarity in truths
bind more than
release)
4.
condensation
proves diamonds
resurface
upon outsides
of glass walls,
crystallizing
our thoughts

a series of poems

1. heart attack
jolts through the system;
shock
sets
in (numb)
blood vessels expand &
contract at the sight of
dried fluid's remnants

2. in the skies;
yellow stars sparkle &
diamonds glisten;
impurities within color.
only accept transparency.

3. celestial bodies of
night light shine
on town's night life,
cars don't stop

(their lives
are the emergency
to tend to first)

4. deconstructed intentions
collapse. Your feet of
clay have crumbled; bodies of
pyrite may be stronger
than gold, but
they're worthless.

5. wash away
& clean up litter
in the streets quickly;
congestion
impedes upon progress

make it all worthwhile

licks your toes &
warmth arises; like your
dog asking for

love, fire burns.

fingers

under mossy branches,
mist descends slowly.
enveloping the ground,
the grass reaches &
embraces the sky,
smothering open air

with soiled hands

old man winter

the man knocks
on wood
ice is accumulating
on his eyebrows
diamond arches form

rosepetals

roots push into asphalt &
stem through concrete
(petals through flowerbuds)

sewer feeds;
draining vitality

aural entry

slithering tongues
slip past the guards
your mind built up

enter the holes
in your ears, past your &
snaking down
your throat, don't

gasp you'll choke

freedom

echoes in the hall
reverbrate, bones
in the ears quivering

anticipation builds
& SNAP

green vines

tendrils sweep down from
the ceiling, envelop you & caress
everywhere you don't want
to be felt

saved

fecund scent of
pregnant silence
fills our nostrils.

cut the tension

differance?

inuenndos trapped
in common language;
a barrier that unites
& unties the implications
upon our lives

that we weave
back and forth
on a loom; analyze
& deconstruct
intentions, tear
the threads apart

poetry to a lover

scripted lines
read off of a page
never seem
sincere;

fumbling with
empty claims
& lost causes

that no one will
ever understand

spinal tap & decomposition

fingernails peel slowly
raking the spinal cord,
needles plunge in and

you arch in pain
& ecstasy

blow jobs & bulimia

fingertips on the tip of
the mouth, passing the lips
and encountering
a choking sensation,

you reached the back
of the throat already

(& please stop)

sexual tension?

under linen sheets,
grey transforms into white
explosions under the covers

winter time

the hiss of steam escapes
from the mouth, tongue
stuck on a frozen steel pole

stratocaster

tension; string is snapped
back into position and resonates
with sound filling the air

and anxiety cut in half

fourth of july

bombs explode in the distance,
fireworks over the sky & sheen on the water
reflections of independence

matrices

I'm here right here
so far far away from
the rest of the world

and only you can see me

rev

clamps down
on the automobile,
energy surges

going nowhere

anticipation

water rushes & the
holes in your head
accumulate, festering

anxiety

flies rise from the dusty ground
flitting around the light,
& cat paws at the air aimlessly.

progress

billboards smile down
main street's crowded
nowadays
& the barber shop
on the corner closed

rain falls from the sky.

oklahoma

dust in the cracks
of a faded smile,
the creaking chair
hit by tumbleweed.
grey sky and beige clouds,
red earth unwillingly
parts from its roots

a leaving song

the sky waits impatiently
for the moon to arrive,
watching with anxiety as
the sun drags its feet
across the horizon.

timekeeper

dust flies up,
and the cars never stop
to check on the status
of the lack of life.

jernalistik endevors

blank white pages stare,
lines beg to be defied

driving in the rain

wheels skid
and run into a cross
on the side of the road,
crushing flowers

cutting through the fog

the trickling water
seeps into our pores,
pouring down
without a care from the sky

rejuvenation &
an opportunity
for the roots
in our souls to
rejoice.

thunderstorms

water droplets form
glass paperweights
on the leaves of ferns.

the weighty liquid seeps through
past the tendrils of bright green
hidden by a stop sign.

life passes by daily.

new ampersand improved

fence posts break
when dead trees
crush the restrictions

spring pushes through

icicles glimmer
breaking up the sun's rays
dancing in the dripping
water hits the ground
and sinks into the roots

soil regenerates
ashen state rejuvenated
droplets run their fingers over
the ground tilling the dirt
& seeping through
(gentle caresses
sooth the backbone)

material gain

before I reach
twenty syllables,
you will have discovered
the meaning of

haiku story

{these function fine separately, but also go together.}

stars shine on, and the
sky's reflection doesn't fade.
Filled with emptiness.

blankets spread over
fields of grass, car parked in the
ant hills-collateral.

girl looks sideways &
the silence is gold, but at
this point, don't turn back.

insects cry out. Perhaps
there may be new beginnings,
but their homes are gone.

boy rolls over; his hands
capture a grasshopper. Lives
balance violently.

struggles are pointless,
& clasped hands wash out past crimes.
Humanity's shameless.

uncertainty

much like the way
that this sentence will begin
but never end this conversation,
(that I am having with myself &)
thoughts trickle down,
rain keeps falling.

silence

fill the room
with conversation,
empty out the
soul & mind.

bodies take
over

calculated efforts

tear ducts
can't be taped
shut; eye colors
don't change

& (injecting dye
into the iris
causes pain;
an attempted
metamorphosis)

academia

yellow highlighters
fade away; every
season has its end
& the leaves all
fall eventually

(comes, but the ink
dried out)

existences, draft two

Flowers, they'll all
wilt one day-
after all,
spring isn't gifted with
eternity.

Yet it doesn't mean
the world will stop spinning.
Even the dead petals
will turn into something
that much more beautiful
after they've fallen.

And their existences may never
be appreciated while they bloom,
but who's to say
what their meaning was
while they were alive?

*co-credits go to Amy Ho

and when the saints come marchin' in

Do you wonder
why drum beats
sound like sex?

There's some monotony
to it that
I just can't
understand.

note to the reader

PLEASE ANALYZE MY
POETRY; I PROMISE
YOU THAT EVERY
LAST LINEBREAK, AND
EXTRA SPACE MEANS
SOMETHING; IN NO WAY AT ALL
IS THERE EVEN THE
POSSIBILITY THAT MAYBE
MY PUBLISHER JUSTMADE A MISTAKE.
GOOD POETRY CAN ONLY
BE REALISED, APPARENTLY,
WHEN DISSECTED
UNDER A MICROSCOPE.

satisfaction

cracked pepper kernel
stuck between the teeth
with a huge grin

universal meaning

crunch of autumn leaves
underneath the falling tree trunk

acorns scattered all around,
life giving & taking.
(soil regenerates.)

deadlines

the cracks in your hands
& holes in your spine

eat away the
acids of the day
(& accumulate,
fermenting.)

parental guidance

What a hullabaloo,
for I am trapped
(Ahoy! The water’s breaking!)
in(& out of)an amniotic* egg-
such is life (this place of
mortality)I LOVE YOU SO MUCH
(were I to lose) to
you-the most price, less
(all would be forsaken)
-----------
*AMNIOTIC-amnion, n. pl. amnions or amnia: A thin, tough, membranous sac that encloses the embryo or fetus of a mammal, bird, or reptile. It is filled with a serous fluid in which the embryo is suspended.
Dictionary.com, 2005/12/23

ampersand love

hearts don't belong
on their sides
or on their back

& sometimes,
when they break
you can hear
the shattering

on the sides of the roads
in your arteries

& love.

backseat

the sky's sparkling

because the stars are crying,
and the gods are laughing at us;
forming the shapes of our lives

in the sand freely

fingertips lightly altering pathways

we carved for ourselves

with an air of permanence

so let's run away tonight

but I'll never be able to give you head;
see, I don't like

getting on my knees

blurb.

I like nature,
&sometimes
it kicks me
in the face.

when you run your fingers through my hair ...

fingertips
the shade of
flower petals
in the sun,

glistening with
morning rain (&
dog's breath

panting heavily)

meadows

spin hard enough
and the skirt will form a halo
around your waist

lace surrounding your senses,
(lavender enveloping
your sense of smell) &
summer is never in the air

anymore

new beginnings

ordinary days
pass by slower
than the one before.

last moments always
go by the fastest

grassy pastures

sheer persistence
may have had a factor in this;
sometimes, goats don't like
to be forced to eat (& they rebel)

existences

the sun still shines
the day after.
(you're dead)

dominance

ice freezes over a branch
clear coating of sugary nature.

little boy chomps it down
& the little girl nibbles;
(they are reprimanded
for exchanging gender roles.)

&&& a sense of urgency

sometimes,
(kittens sleep in circles
dogs chase their tails)

&humans walk on by
unpertubed

the circle of life

salmon swim upwards
and the bears
go right on down

(because spiral staircases
never really lead anywhere anyways)

miniature

like tiny seashells
in your cupped palm,
flower petals
will all one day wilt

(from too much air
and too little water)

cough

twelve year old
dies of papercuts
(love notes written on
notebook paper

&inkstains on her heart)

fragile

dolls&paper
made of dust
don't hold up

in the rain

closure

wrap your fingers
around my spine

push past the flesh
&gently bend
paper clips
from wire cutters

indeterminancy

giant towers
&little girl
hugs the leg
of the beast

crushing
its ability to hurt her
(loved&cherished)

subjectivity

little girl looks
down at her doll
says"honey I want to be beautiful like you"

porcelain eyes stare
up lifeless
&they're both discontent

smooth

like unfinished wood
rainbow arches
turn to red and yellow

consumer drive bys
on the side of the road

&everyone's happy about it

roadside excursions

little girl walks alongside the pool
slashed yellow floaties on
her arms(are bruised and bent up)
from chasing her dog through the woods earlier

&the next day
her intestines are found
in the pool drainage

(slashed yellow remnants)